


demon

by booksameliad



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Demon Shane Madej, i'm jumping on the demon shane train
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-05
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-02-10 21:28:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 2,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12920616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/booksameliad/pseuds/booksameliad
Summary: ❝ i'm going to slit your throat in your sleep if you keep talking about that. ❞❝ oh, so scary! ❞long story short, shane is a demon





	1. the boys are here!

shane grins, looking at ryan as he slowly opens the door.

"what, you afraid the ghost is going to be waiting behind the door so when you open it it can pop out at you?"

"no, no." ryan shook his head. "it's not gonna do that, because it wants to talk to me."

"sure." shane muttered, walking behind ryan down the hallway. he shut the door behind them, making sure it wasn't locked before continuing.

"the boys are here!" shane grinned, loudly exclaiming the phrase as they stepped into the main room of the mansion they're staying the night in.

"shane, stop!"

shane laughed while staring down the demon behind ryan, challenging him to attack ryan with him here. the demon eventually looked away and disappeared, and shane grinned, slinging an arm around ryan's shoulders as they continued throughout the room.

"i bet you there will be no demons or ghosts in here tonight."

"oh, really? how much?"

"five hundred dollars."

"oh it's on."


	2. whaddya mean mate?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I THOUGHT I HAD UPDATED THIS WITH THE SECOND AND THIRD CHAPTER! FUCK, SORRY.

"nope." ryan shook his head, stepping away from the door. "we are not sleeping in there."

"aw, why not ryan?" shane asked, tilting his head. "it'll be fun! a new adventure!"

"no."

"why? scared you'll see a g-g-g-ghost butt?"

"no, i just... don't wanna deal with any ghosts right now."

"well, you can sleep in a different room, but i'm gonna sleep in here."

shane stepped in, his eyes flashing black for a second before returning to his usual brown eyes.

the one-eyed demon in the middle of the room stopped and turned around, staring at shane. the latter grinned, and his hair flickered for a second, showing small horns, but they disappeared. shane grinned, and his eyes turned black again.

the one-eyed demon fled, disappearing just like the first one.

shane returned his eyes to normal human eyes and straightened his shirt out, messing his hair up again. just as he was about to set down his sleeping bag, ryan came through the door, talking five-hundred miles a hour about some noises he heard of people talking and "no one but us are here shane, what if it's ghosts????".

 


	3. ahh! songs!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know the songs aren't their actual music taste, it was just what i was listening to at the time

on the ride back to la, shane sleeps in the backseat, laid across the backseat with all the camera equipment in the floor of the passenger seat. ten minutes in, he's already asleep.

ryan glances back at him halfway through the ride before looking back at the road, trying his best not to crash. when the traffic finally catches up to their car, he takes the time to plug in his phone, and clicks play on one of his many playlists.

twenty percent cooler starts playing in the car and he grins, lip syncing along as he drums his fingers on the wheel. he turns the volume down when he remembers that someone is sleeping in the back behind him.

he continues lip syncing all the songs that come on during the drive to la (or really, a hotel that's eight hours away).

he only lowers the volume of his music more when he hears a groan come from the back during cool patrol.

he glances back before returning to the practice he's doing of not crashing.

when shane wakes up, he insists on listening to his 'music', which is just their buzzfeed unsolved episodes, except you can only hear them talking.

"i'm bored. sue me."

"yes, i would like to sue shane madej for being a total asshole for one hundred grand please."

"hi, that is not possible because he's already sued you."

shane blinked, his yes turning black before turning regular again.

not before ryan saw, but he didn't say a word, just thought that it was a trick of the eye.

and maybe it was.


	4. a haunted mansion. oh, fun.

"why did you choose this one, out of all the haunted mansions in this country? this is one is known for people dying as soon as they step in."

shane wasn't worried about the mansion itself. it was just a two-story place, with a dry swimming pool and marble all in the house.

however, he was worried about the ghosts inside the place.

their names were mallory and molly jackson. they died when they were both twenty-five, being poisoned by their younger brother so that he could inherit the building, but the sisters returned as ghosts, killing the man, before killing everyone else in the house.

everyone who steps in is killed by them, with either something simple (like something falls on top of them) or something a little complex (they get poisoned from their own drink).

shane isn't worried for himself, but for ryan and the crew, because they won't be able to resist the sisters' traps.

so, he has to somehow get ryan and the crew in a safe room, where they won't wander out while he kills the sisters in their afterlife.

fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> plz comment i don't know if this is good enough or not 
> 
> also, any miniminter fans??? (he's great, shush)


	5. hey, look. it's a g- bitch. guys, it's a bitch!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't @ me i know it's terrible
> 
> also plz comment i need them to survive

of course, when shane finally gets ryan and tj and the others to try out some stuff in a safe room, he locks it.

he can't exactly have them escaping, can he?

obviously, since he's done that and there aren't any other humans around, he immediately flicks on the badass eyes and the claws flick out and-

what? he sees you staring at those claws, and lemme tell you he's making a fucking fashion statement right here and there as he hunts the sisters.

so, of course they show up right when he starts talking to himself.

"no, shane! demons and ghosts are real! let me use the crappy evidence of someone sounding suspiciously like will smith talking! it's not like you're a demon or anything! i'm just a doofus who murders in his spare time!"

"wow. didn't know we would be getting such easy prey betty." he whipped around, glancing for any signs of a little something sticking out. a piece of clothing, a bit of hair, the start of an er- you know what, he's just not gonna finish that thought.

"hmm. almost as if he just knows we're here." he could hear rustling behind him, but kept acting like he was looking in front of him. "but no one's that idiotic."

he sensed her hand reaching out (wanting to touch his horns perhaps?) and whipped around like a bullet, yanking her arm and shoving his hand on her face.

she squirmed, trying to escape, but his hold was too strong, and he sent her spirit to whatever place she had believed in, laying her would to rest. he turned towards the second sister, and she raised her hands, shuffling towards him.

"just get it over with." he quickly did the process, wiping his hand on the walls as he headed back towards where ryan and the others were probably freaking out.

unfortunately, in front of the door was at least five demons. well, unfortunately for them.

at the end of the short fight, he wiped off his clothes and fixed his claws and eyes, making sure they were gone before plastering his normal, everyday look on his face and unlocking the door, stepping in.

"hey, guys, I can't find anything spooky, so I was wondering if we could go get tacos?" he casually asked as they (as in ryan) just stared at him.

"what?" ryan exclaimed, "tac- no gh- you know what? fuck it. we're done, there's no ghosts or paranormal activity here, we're leaving and apparently getting taco bell and then we're going to cry eat them in our hotel room and then cry ourselves to sleep. goodnight everybody."

ryan shook his head as he walked away, muttering, "un-fucking-believeable."

shane laughed. "who's going to cry eat the tacos and who's going to cry themselves to sleep?"

"me."

"on which one?"

"every, single, one."

shane laughed at him. "i can see why people say you're the serial killer in our group."

tj called out, "he may be short but he's full of fury."

"i'm going to slit your throats in the middle of the night and act like someone broke in, and you won't be laughing at me. why? cause you'll be fucking dead because I fucking killed you!"

"now I know why he has a short temper." shane grinned at tj. "it lasts as long as his height."

"you're fucking dying tonight when I use a sledgehammer to your penguin face."

"not a good insult, but better than the previous ones."

"shut up t. you're second, and i'm gonna use blunt knife, only after I use it on shane, because it'll cause you even more fucking pain."

shane wrapped an arm across his shoulder. "c'mon ryan. let's go get those tacos and cry into them."


	6. what?

dear ryan,

you're dead. stop stealing the greatest demon away from me

sincerely, me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so if you like my writing yada yada, check out my story thief because i love klaus baudelaire and more people need to read about him and duncan and violet (but the story focuses on duncan and klaus)


	7. i'm so confused!

who the hell is this?

ryan stares at the paper in front of him, which looked like it had gone through hell and back. there were burnt marks all over it, and it looked like it had been crumbled a thousand times and then crumbled again.

"hey, shane?"

"yeah?" shane poked his head in, "whaddya need?"

"any idea why someone would send this to me?"

when shane saw the letter, his face darkened, the smile on his face disappearing.

"i have to go." he walked out, and ryan, more confused than ever, let him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> plz check out thief i need support
> 
> also comments for this would be cool too i guess


	8. no, noooo!

"abby, why did you send ryan that letter?" he growls as he walks towards, but she only laughs.

"c'mon, you were eventually going to scare the boy! i just made it even better! that way it's even better when you reveal you're a demon!" she grins, nudging his arm. "anyways, we gotta have as much fun as we can with him before he runs away screaming."

"i don't any part in your dirty tricks, abby. i've had enough with them." he said coldly, glaring at her.

"look, I don't give a rats ass on what you want. i'm my own person, and I get to decide if I want to scare other people or not, okay? i can do whatever the hell I want, and you can't stop me," she glared, stepping into his personal space, "i could kill ryan, and you couldn't tell me I shouldn't do it, because I can decide what I want to do. I can kill someone who deserves it, okay?"

"really? what's he done, then. give me one reason, and I won't try to stop you."

"i can't think of one right now, but i'll give you it later." she stood up, grabbing her bag, pulling it on her shouder. "bye asshole!"

she blew a kiss at him before walking away, and shane gave her retreating back the bird.

 


	9. the government, man

"uh, shane? what the fuck are you doing here?" ryan sighed, staring at shane as he stood outside his apartment complex.

"um, they kicked me out of mine." shane hid his hands behind his back, shrugging when ryan looked at him weirdly. "what? you know they regularly do this! they do it so that they which are the owners, can have loud ass sex and have no one hear them!"

"i'm-i'm not even going to ask? just, what the fuck?" ryan followed shane inside, and just shrugged when shane went into the bathroom and locked the door. he just turned on the tv and turned to channel 248, where the winter soldier was currently fighting captain america, and he sighed, grabbing his drink off the counter and chugging it.

-

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck-

his hands won't turn back to his regular fucking human color. no, it ain't all peachy, it's fucking black at the end oh no-

he's dead.

oh, he's so, so dead.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is crappy lol
> 
> so, like, send me asks and request things (like hurt peter parker oneshots and no shyan oneshots) plz i need to do something
> 
> https://booksamelia.tumblr.com/


	10. too long in the bathroo- not for that reason

"hey, shane, are you alright in there? you've been in there for half a hour, and you're concerning me." ryan asked, knocking lightly on the door.

"yeah, yeah, I'm fine! I'm fine! just, give me a few more minutes." his voice sounded strained, even to himself.

“okay man,” ryan walked away and shane sighed, wrapping his arms around himself again. of course this has to happen when he gets kicked out of his apartment. maybe he can say he accidentally got black paint on his fingers? but didn’t ryan see his fingers when he walked in? and if he went to wash it off, it wouldn’t come off.

maybe he can say it won’t wash off.

yeah.

except, the black is receding.

why.

why is he a demon? he could’ve been anything else, and he wouldn’t of had to deal with _this_ , but yet here he is. being a demon. having to do mundane things.

why did he sign up to do this job.

he hates his life.

“shane! stop jerking off! i need to pee!”

_shiiiiiiiit_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry these are short! i just feel like it's kinda better with short chapters?


	11. another letter?

ryan was bored while waiting for shane to finish in the bathroom.

while he was assuming what shane was doing, he opened a letter he got in the mail that day, from an unknown address.

he pulled he crumbled piece of paper out, he quickly read the short letter.

**dear ryan,**

**are you ready?**

**i sure as hell am.**

**the end for you is coming.**

**i send you the best of wishes.**

what the fuck?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please send me ideas to write of shane and ryan (and maybe demon shane) and i'll turn one into a story and the others into oneshots 
> 
> https://www.tumblr.com/blog/booksamelia
> 
> also this is so crappy and short so sorry


	12. oh no, except it's a second, unrelated part

**_FUCK!_ **

shane is screwed. he is screwed. he's screwed. he's screwed. he's screwed. he's screwed. he's screwed. he's screwed. he's screwed. he's screwed.

fuck, he has to go to andrew's or steven's or eugene's or someones place.

 _IT'S A CODE RED!_ he texts to the groupchat, and he sees their bubbles, but then they don't continue, and he's so confused, and so, so helpless.

he needs his friends.

 _come to my place_. he sees eugene send, and he sighs in relief as he quickly walks out of ryan's place, making sure ryan doesn't see him as he opens his door and closes it, disappearing.

eugene is an angel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sned me shit on tumblr. im booksamelia on it!


	13. unlucky, amirite?

she skims the pages, looking for the certain word until she finds, and slams it onto the table in front of him. "there. that's the spell to banish a demon.

"really? that's all I need to do when-"

"when you go to the haunted house, yes, yes." she impatiently shoved the book towards him, standing up to leave.

"wait, when do you want me to give this back to you?" he exclaimed, jumping up. she stopped to turn towards him, a smirk on her face.

"keep it as long as you want, ryan. I have no use for it now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> check out my tumblr: booksamelia.
> 
> lmao i'm sorry the chapters are short i'm focusing on two stories at the moment so if you want you can check them out! they're the other side and realizations and i would love it if you read them! i'll try to update this again but idk when.


	14. why does he have that?

shane hopes that he's dreaming when he finds the spell book in ryans' car when he's waiting in the car for ryan to come back out from his apartment, and he's getting bored waiting for ryan, so he's looking around when he spots the book in the back and he freezes. he grabs the book and curses when he flips to the front page.

_darling, you already know who owns this_

he shoves it to the bottom of his bag before ryan comes out, because why would she give it to ryan? unless...

ryan wouldn't do that.

would he?

can he trust ryan?

"hey, man, you okay?"

he jumps, turning to look at ryan. "what?"

"are you okay?" ryan asks slowly, staring at him. "when i got into the car you were staring at nothing."

"yeah, i'm fine. i didn't get enough sleep last night, and that reminds me. do you think we can stop by starbucks so i can get a coffee with a shit-ton of caffeine in their largest size?" shane asked, as casually as he could.

ryan sighed, but he grabbed his phone and typed the instructions in, shoving the phone at shane. "tell me the directions."

"you need to back out first."

"you dickhead, i know that."


	15. um, oh great building

"Hey, ghosts? Demons? I have a favor I wanted to ask. Do you think you can make something spooky happen, but you not appear? He doesn't need good proof that ghosts are real, so if you just like moved a can or dropped something like that, it's be great." Shane walked along the wall, looking around, trying to find any ghosts or demons near him.

"Yo! Chatty!" Shane turned around, and the demon right behind him. "You might want to stop fucking with us demons, or else you and your friend won't leave this place alive. If you know what's good for you, walk out the door to this room and forget what happened."

Shane laughed. He laughed like he found the best thing in the whole wide world, and it was hilarious.

"Dude! What are you doing?" Another demon appeared, his skin as pale as snow and his eyes as red as hell. "That's-"

"Ath'tir, isn't it?" Shane interrupted, flicking his wrist at the second demon, whose mouth slammed shut. "I've heard a lot about you."

Ath'tir shrinked back slightly, before puffing out their chest and trying to seem brave. "Yes, I'm Ath'tir. How do you know?"

Shane stuck out his hand, "Name's Aras."

"The Prince of Hell." The second demon whispered in shock, and Shane really needs to start remembering all the demons names.

"Yep!" Shane popped the 'p' as his hands turned black. "And I really need a favor from you guys, and any ghosts that are listening, like Elizabeth over there."


	16. reveal

"Your friend's a demon." The girl sits down in front of him, crossing her arms as she leans back. Ryan stares at her with a confused face, the question on the tip of his tounge before she speaks again. "He's on BuzzFeed Unsolved."

"I'm not a demon!" Is the first thing that comes out of his mouth, and he's in shock, because it can't be Shane, it just  _can't_  be.

Right?

"Your friend, Shane?" She grins, and Ryan shivers, "You've never noticed him sneaking off?"

"He always had to do something!" He protested, and even he knew it was desperate.

Even he knew Shane was a demon.

Because he was weak like the rest of them.

Because he was a believer.

And he believed Shane was a demon.


End file.
